Warning: This post is not a happy puppy dog rainbow post. This post is REAL and is where I am at this moment in this journey.
I am overwhelmed, overwhelmed doesn’t even do what I am feeling justice. Overwhelmed with all the choices we have to make regarding Katy’ care…taking care of Patrick. You know still trying to live life with a head above water
I am afraid… a fear like I have never known. My 2.5 year old daughter could die of sudden cardiac arrest.
I’m angry… WHY ME! WHY KATE! WHY US!!! I
I’m frustrated at our family members that are just so selfish they are useless and to our other family members that are still in denial…both annoying things to have to deal with I mean we are facing life altering things here.
I’m sad… I’m yearning for all the hopes and dreams I had for where we would be at this point in my life and let me tell sitting and waiting with my two year old on heart transplant list wasn’t part of it.
I’m disappointed that Life doesn’t just stop and wait for us to get over this HUGE event and then pick up where we left off…that would make this process almost bearable. But, nope our lease is up in September, so we must start searching for apartments in this area. Must be close to Children's, laundry still piles up, dinners need to be made and birthdays need to be celebrated.
I miss my friends… I feel like I haven’t been invited to a mommy or baby play date in forever, and I am guessing its because I had to cancel so many ;(
I miss my husband… I miss the connection, love and fun we had on a daily basis, now its all we can do to get through the day without killing one another. I know we will get through this, and will probably be stronger for it afterwards.
I’ll try not to let these negative posts sneak through too often, but sometimes I need to get it out?